speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out

(I guess I’ll write a series of these until I get bored. No, these are not directed at anyone…for now at least haha. And most events are just figments of my imagination or my dreams)

Dear _________,

You will never know who I am. But I will write you letters because I think I am horribly in love with you, but you and I will never work out. I’ve designed flow charts and solved system of equations to prove that our lives will never intersect. There is no need to know, you don’t need to know. Just burn these letters if you don’t want to read them. I just, I don’t know. I just really need to get out these feelings, you know?

So who am I? Okay, well, I won’t tell you so much you’ll find out, but I will tell you that I am, yes, a male. Also, I am horribly in love with you. Have I said that already?

I fell in love with you because you were the most amazing girl in the crowd. Look, it’s not easy for me to just say that I’m in love with someone. Love is such a strong word to me. But you were the exception. You found things that only I thought I would find funny, funny. You always listened to me and gave me feedback that was invaluable. Mostly, I just can’t stop thinking about you. I can’t stop thinking about how your nose crinkles up, or how your eyes look when you laugh. But most importantly, I can’t stop thinking about your vibrant spirit, your determination to succeed, your smile and your happiness. 

I love everything about you, your perfections and your imperfections. I love the way you miss class because you forget, even though it’s a regular thing. I love the way you manage to lose everything, even though you swore you had it a second ago. I love how you wander around outside thinking about absolutely nothing.

But we can’t be together, because you are too high above me. You are, you are looking at something beyond me, and I can feel it. And I know that today, and tomorrow, and probably even a month from now, I’ll still be horribly in love with you. And this world is cruel, and it’s unfair, but these are obvious facts about life. My friend told me that it was alright, because based on the multiverse theory, in another universe, you have fallen in love with me as well. It comforts me that somewhere we are together even if it’s not in our dimension. 

It’s 6 AM, and I have to study/sleep, but I had to write to you because I couldn’t get these things off my mind. Please don’t be too curious about who I am. Just pretend that…that I am some kind of wind, alright? That I’m some kind of wind, whispering words of nothingness into your ears.

Sincerely,

S